Santa Banta Strikes Again


Titanic was sinking.
 
An Englishman asked Santa, "How far is land"?
Santa: 2 KMs.
 
Englishman jumped into sea.
Englishman: Now, which direction?
 
Santa: Downwards !
 


Two days of powercut in Delhi had made life miserable. Worst affected was Delhi Metro station where families of Santa & Banta were struck for 48 hrs on escalators.
 


 
 
How did Santa tried to kill a bird??
 
He took it to the top of a building and dropped it from there to die.
 


Santa: I have swallowed a Kay.
 
Doctor: When?
 
Santa: 3 months back!
 
Doctor: What were you doing till now?
 
Santa: I was using duplicate key, now I have lost it too.
 


Santa was drawing money from ATM. Banta, who was just behind him in the line said: I've seen ur password. It's ****. Santa: U r wrong. It's 1394.
 


Santa falls in love with a nurse... After much thinking, he finally writes a love letter to her: "I luv u sister ."
 


Santa asked Banta: Why Manmohan Singh goes for a walk in evening?
 
Banta: Very simple, because he is PM not AM.
 


Teacher: What should be in a book to make it a bestseller?
 
Pappu: A girl on the cover and no cover on the girl .
 


A lady calls Santa for repairing door bell.
 
Santa doesn't turns up for 4 days.
 
Lady calls again, Santa replies: I'm coming daily since 4 days, I press the bell but no one comes out.
 
 
 
 
 
Lady to inspector Santa: My husband went to buy potatos 5 days ago, he hasn't came back yet!
 
Santa: Why don't u cook something else? .
 


An Englishman and Santa inside the toilet.
 
Englishman: Good evening, how do u do?
 
Santa: Good evening, we open the zip and do!  
 


Santa opened a petrol pump, but not even one customer went there. You know why?
 
Because he opened petrol pump on second floor..
 


Ultimate answer while changing the job.
 
Interviewer: Why did you changed your last job?
 
Santa: Because the company shifted and didn't tell me where.
 


Santa and Banta went for a drive.
 
Santa: Hey, look out from the window, are the indicators working or not?
 
Banta puts his head out & says "Yes-No, Yes-No, Yes-No, Yes-No!!!"
 


Santa's wife dies. He is calm, but his wife's lover is crying furiously...
 
Finally, Santa consoles him: Don't worry buddy, I will marry again.
 


Why did Santa keep the door open while bathing?
 
Because he was afraid that someone might watch him from the key hole.
 


Santa phoned his wife: I am not coming home . The steering, dash board, gears of car have been stolen.
 
After sometime he calls again: I am coming , earlier I sat on the back seat.